Woman can judge man’s intentions much faster than his thoughts…
There is a saying that man don’t listen very actively when woman are talking to them. Well this is not just an over statement but every married couple would have this issue. The reason I am saying ‘married couple’ is that I know all wives would agree but those who are in a relation but yet not married would feel that my man is different, unlike all other man. The reason she feels so is that those man who are unmarried are a little insecure that if they won’t listen to their lady love she might leave him, hence even if they are not listening they have to at least pretend that they are listening. Married man is already secure on this front. So, he need not even pretend to listen when told at once, as he knows that his wife will not leave him on such a petty matter.
Woman more or less realizes this fact at some point of their relationships with man, hence she has to make use of other indirect means as my column; wives would make sure that the husband has read it. Whereas man does not need any such indirect mean of communication to put their view across. Women have their hearing aid on them all the time, even when they are watching their favorite show or an interesting program they would still be aware of what, to whom and how long has their partner been talking on phone or in person. Whereas man does not have such ability to actively listen and grasp two things at a time, it would rather annoy them and they would ask their partners to leave the room.
Complain that man don’t listen very actively during routine conversation is not merely associated to woman but also man, when they get the gist of conversation; they are least bothered of the details and other connotations attached to the talk. Whereas woman are more interested in the details, emotional involvement and description of the talk than just the mere gist. This difference in the gender is due to the difference in biological development of brain in woman and man. Women are more emotional so they give more attention to emotional side than the logical work up of the event or conversation and vice a versa. This could also be one of the reasons why woman like more fiction novels where novelist is very elaborative in their descriptions. Hence, as a matter of fact woman who have the inborn ability to judge the person on the basis of their gesture or non verbal cues are comparatively less able to judge their thoughts with same accuracy. Probably this explains the common belief that woman have less sense of humor as their mind takes longer time to click compared to their heart.
Men have a more analytical mind so can they easily jump to the conclusion or gist of the talk and hence believes that it is not necessary to pay lot of importance to the entire description with minute details. It also gives a kind of over confidence leading to certain mistakes or misunderstanding on their part. This is the reason why men are found less in professional positions where more listening skills are needed e.g. customer service executives, public relation managers, counselor, interpreter etc.
Tricky part of this gender difference in handling conversation comes now. Women think that he has not heard her properly so she tends to repeat her talk like news channels due to which man will become all the more less attentive, as he knows that even if not heard, this he will catch up at the repeat telecast ! Men’s tendency of not listening completely and women’s tendency of repeating becomes a cyclical habit and cycle goes on. Breaking this cycle is very important for avoiding lot of petty interpersonal issues between man and woman. woman needs to control her urge to repeat the talk when once told, and man need to assure woman of being heard by developing patience and hearing her entire narration with details in one go.
Reflection: Wires controlling woman’s tongue fires much faster than those controlling her logical processing, while vice a versa is true for a man.